Shadows in the Light: Chapter Two of Oscar’s story

In Haven’s War, we meet Gina, who told Haven that Oscar got her out of a bad situation, but she wasn’t willing to go into details. Today we’re going to see how Oscar and Gina met, and who Gina used to be.

 

Six Years Ago

“Pay attention, Oscar! This meeting is for your benefit, not mine.”

I heaved a sigh. It wasn’t like I hadn’t been listening to Knight. Young man in desperate need of cash, wealthy family, only beneficiary in the will. It also wouldn’t be the first time I’d heard the story, either. Shit, people could do some really fucked up stuff in the name of money. It was a lesson I’d learned over and over again in the six years I’d worked for the organization.

I ground my teeth. They had a job they wanted handled. I had someone who was stealing money from his family. No idea why they thought it would be difficult. I held up my hand and mocked a mouth talking. “All I heard after kill order was a lot of blah blah blah. Let me know if you’re going to come up with anything important.”

This time Knight sighed. “You know, you’re a pain in my ass.”

I waggled my eyebrows at him. “Not yet, but if you bend over—”

He waved a hand at the same time as he made a face as though he’d sucked on a lemon. “Yeah, no. Listen to me, this is important. The kid’s made threats against his family. They’re scared and holed up in their house. Maximillian Kearney hasn’t been seen or heard from in days, but that’s got them all the more nervous. They say he’s unstable, off his meds, and prone to violent outbursts. I know that normally we react instead of act, but in this case, I think it’s warranted to take preemptive action to ensure he’s not able to make good on his threats.”

I reached up and brushed the tip of my finger over his lips. “Your mouth is so pretty when you’re using it to make big words. What do you think it would look like around my cock?”

He huffed a disgusted breath. “You are a sick bastard. If you weren’t the best agent—”

I feigned shock. “I thought that was Haven.”

Knight shook his head. “I’ve never seen him in action. You, on the other hand? I sincerely doubt Rook’s guy holds a candle to you.”

I’d seen Haven in the field. He was brutal and took no prisoners. I once saw him cut off a guy’s hand who had touched a kid inappropriately. Then, when the guy started screaming, Haven shoved the bloody end in his mouth and duct taped it there, telling him if he wanted something in his mouth so badly he had to rape a little boy to get it, then Haven would help him out. He let the guy gag for close to an hour before he shot the fucker in the head. I was in total awe of him. Plus, he was hot. I would have given that bastard a ride to remember, if he wasn’t such a control freak.

“Oscar!”

My head snapped up and I glared at Knight. “Kill order. Got it. Give me an address and let me get to it.”

He gave me my file, wished me luck, then went back to whatever it was he’d been doing. The smile on his face as he tapped at the keys on his laptop freaked me out. It wasn’t often I saw him smile. Normally he had this perpetual scowl, which explained the deep lines around his eyes. I put it out of my mind, because I had a job to do.

I got into my car and checked the time. There was still two hours before I needed to be at the airport. I drove to the parking lot, parked, opened the trunk for my bag, then went in to check in for my flight. I sat on one of the benches, opened the folder, and began familiarizing myself with my target.

The file on Maximillian was thin at best. Art major, specialized in paints. Had attracted interest from galleries around the country with his technique of blending strange fluids into his paint to give them a deeper color. He’d used juice extracts, oils, and—my gaze froze on the words. “Fuck. Who the hell would use piss and come in paintings? And why would anyone want those things in their houses?”

The kid was a sicko all right. And if his family needed to be kept safe from him, then I’d be the one to do it. Plus, there was the benefit of my fee. One hundred thousand bucks per hit, with very few expenses, had allowed me to amass quite a nest egg. When—if—I quit, I’d have a very tidy sum to hold me over. But I liked my job. Aw, who was I kidding? I fucking love my job. There’s something about taking a scum sucking leech off the face of the earth and getting paid for it that did my heart proud.

As I waited for the plane that would take me to Milwaukee, Wisconsin, I thumbed through the file again. It wasn’t my normal dossier. Usually Knight’s files held reams of paperwork, telling me everything from the target’s blood type to the date when they lost their virginity. Still, if this was all he’d been able to dig up on soon to be dead Maximillian, so be it. Knight had never steered me wrong before, and I saw nothing to suggest he’d ever do it in the future.

After they called for the flight to board, I found myself next to a woman dressed in full habit. I groaned and hoped to hell she wouldn’t sit next to me. Naturally, that’s exactly where she ended up. On the plus side, she had an eReader and had immersed herself in a book during most of the flight.

About an hour outside of Milwaukee we hit a bit of turbulence. It wasn’t anything major, but my seat mate dropped her Kindle into her lap and grabbed the armrest in a death grip., the flight was pretty standard. We were approaching the airport when the sister beside me crossed herself.

“First flight?”

She gave me a smile and clutched her beads a tad tighter. “No. I fly around the country giving talks about domestic violence six times a year. I hate getting on one of these things. If God had meant for me to have wings, he would have made me an angel.”

I knew she meant it as a joke, but I couldn’t laugh. “It must be tough,” I said. “Hearing the stories of people who were abused by those that claimed to love them.”

Her smile faded just a tad, but I know she was feeling a deep pain to the core of her being. “It is, but I think it’s my calling. Besides, it’s not like I don’t have experience.” She pointed to a divot in her cheek.

“Knife?”

She traced a finger over the scar. “Box cutter, actually. He came home one night, drunk off his ass. It wasn’t the first time. When he got there, I served him the meal I’d been keeping for three hours. He wasn’t happy. Said the roast was too dry, the mashed potatoes were cold, and the gravy was lumpy. I told him if he hadn’t been out to the bar without telling me, it would have been all moist and tender when he walked in the door. Well, that didn’t help the situation any. Apparently I’d become a lippy bitch and needed to be put in my place. It was the first—and last—time he ever raised a hand to me. After he passed out, I packed a few of my things and went to a friend’s house. She contacted the shelter and got me in. Long story short, he went to prison for three years, and is now under a restraining order, while I’m out there telling women—and men—they don’t have to accept violence in their safe spot.”

My snort may have been a tad inelegant. “And it doesn’t hurt if you save a few souls along the way, I guess.”

She frowned at me. “I wear jeans and a t-shirt with Calvin and Hobbes on it when I go into meetings. I never tell people I’m a nun, and don’t push my religious views on them. Yes, God helped me get through this, but my journey isn’t for everyone. When I sit down with a group, I’m Gina Garner, not Sister Mary Catherine. I think the journey back to being whole is hard enough without tossing another person into the mix.” She shrugged. “Besides, my beliefs and theirs? Not necessarily going to be the same thing, and I respect that.”

Okay, I felt like an asshole for thinking she’d used her position to turn a few people on to religion. I know that when I was in the military, God had been a big thing. We’d held prayer meetings and everything. I fell out of that habit when—I pressed down hard on the memory. Thinking about it now would only result in anger and the desire to get wasted.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

Her smile came back, full force. She reached out, took my hand, and twined our fingers together. “Nothing to apologize for, I promise. And what about you? Why are you going to Milwaukee?”

I choked back a laugh. What would she say that while she was out there saving souls, I was sending some straight to Hell? I hedged my answer. “Just some business. I don’t think I’ll be there more than a few hours.”

The captain’s voice informed us we would be landing in a few moments. He also gave us a short spiel about the flight, how he hoped we enjoyed it, and then welcomed us to Milwaukee International Airport.

She gazed out the window as we flew over the lake near downtown. “It’s a lovely place. You should give it a chance.  You might like it. They call it a great place on a great lake, but for a lot of years, I called it home.”

I scoffed at the sentimentality. “They have snow in the winter. I promise you I won’t like it.”

She turned to me, her expression dead serious. “You won’t know what you can find if you don’t open your heart to it.”

I held back my disdain for what she was spouting. It wasn’t easy. I hated when religious people said your life would be better if you just follow their rules. “Thank you, Sister, but I’m not looking for anything.”

She placed her hand on my arm. I gazed from it to her earnest expression. “Everyone is looking for something. I know it’s crossing a line talking about religion with you. I get that you’re…hostile to the idea that someone is looking out for you.”

I turned to her, unable to school my features. “Hostile? Is that the word you’re going to use? Tell me something, Sister. And take all the time you need to think on this, okay? What kind of benevolent being allows people to get rich off the misery of others? Why in the hell would you even allow it? Either your God is a sick son of a bitch or he’s got the worst fucking sense of humor I’ve ever seen.”

If I thought she would be angry, Sister Gina had another ace up her sleeve. “I’m not going to tell you that God has a plan, because I don’t know that he does. All of this could be some random confluence of events a billion years or more in the making. Was it pure chance that I was seated next to you? Or are there larger forces at work beyond what we can see?”

“There’s nothing.” That much I was certain of. Seeing my own men get killed proved to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that nothing else existed that could be called a god of peace or love.”

She shrugged. “Fair enough. It’s not my job to convince you. Besides, I could be full of shit and this is all just a toss of the dice. Look, I don’t claim to know all the answers. When I needed help, the sisters were there for me. I thought that doing this gave me a purpose in life. Now? Who the fuck knows? Maybe one day I’ll figure out what I’m really meant to do. Until that time, I might get the chance to help some people. At least until I figure shit out.”

I laughed at her coarse language. I now had a hard time picturing her as a nun, and found her to be someone I’d go to a bar with and get drunk. Shit, maybe that wasn’t such a bad idea.

“I thought you took vows or something?”

She bit her lip. “I did. And at the time, I thought it was what I wanted. Living with the others, working together? That gave me hope. But as time went on, I found myself questioning more and wondering if it really was the life for me. I’ve talked with my spiritual advisor several times, and he keeps reminding me that God moves in mysterious ways. He said there’s a plan for me, even if I haven’t figured it out for myself yet.”

“Smart man.”

She rolled her eyes. “He likes to think so.” She snickered. “Actually, he’s brilliant. He’s not trying to keep me as a nun, because he knows I have to be happy with what I’m doing. I’ve been giving talks to people around the country for the last three  years, and it’s draining. So many horror stories and I know I’m only slapping a bandage on the wounds.” She turned and stared out the window. “Maybe one day when I grow up, I’ll figure out who Gina is.”

I liked this woman. She was something else.

“How long are you in town for, Gina?”

“Until Wednesday. I have a talk with a group of survivors on Monday and a lecture for the college students on the evils of rape and why they ought not be dicks. And I use the term to be gender neutral, because I know plenty of women who can only be described as dicks.”

She had me questioning everything I knew about nuns and religion. If she wasn’t a tight ass, maybe some of the rest of them weren’t either. When they opened the door to the plane, I took my chance. I slipped her a card with an assumed name and secondary number. Last thing I needed was for Knight to find out I had a nun’s number in my work phone. I’d never hear the end of the teasing. “I was hoping you might find time to go out and get a beer. Or a class of wine. Wait. Shit. Do nuns drink?”

“Yes, as long as we don’t make a….” She paused, then waggled her brows. “…habit of it.”

I blinked several times. I could tell she was waiting for a reply, but I was too flabbergasted to say anything. Finally she shrugged. “That one knocks them dead on bingo night.”

Truthfully, I had no idea what I expected, but Gina wasn’t any of those things. I’d always expected that nuns were dour people who looked down their noses at those who weren’t like them. Shit, I’d seen Sister Act…well, some of it. I agreed when Whoopi said she was surrounded by the penguins. When she didn’t poke her eyes out in the second half of the film, I lost interest.

“Yes, Oscar. I’d like to meet you for a drink.” Her brow crinkled. “Wait. This isn’t some strange sex fantasy you’ve got going on, right? I mean I’m not a virgin, so get that out of your mind right now.”

The more she talked, the more I was convinced she and I could be friends. Well, as much as a holy woman could be friends with someone who killed in cold blood.

“Sorry, Sis, but we bat for the same team.” She eyed me curiously. “We both like the dick.”

People around us scowled, but Gina snorted. “Name the time and place.”

The flight attendant bid us a farewell as we departed the plane. “This is your city. You tell me.”

She rubbed her chin as we headed to the baggage carousel. I didn’t have but one small bag stowed, so it wouldn’t take me long.

“Well, I used to go to this place… What was it called? Ugh. You can never remember these things when you want.” She tapped her temple, then her eyes lit up. “Oh! Landmark Bowl. You can drink and do a little bowling at the same time.”

I gave her a dubious look.

“What? It’s been a long time since I’ve gotten my hand on some balls.”

And finally, she broke down my hesitancy and had me laughing. She did a fist pump and grinned so wide, I thought her face would split.

“I knew I’d get you eventually.”

“You’re nothing like I expected.” She smirked. “I didn’t know nuns could swear or drink.”

She shrugged as we watched for our bags. “Like I said before, when I come to give talks, I’m not Sister Mary Catherine. I’m Gina, and she’s got this problem with her mouth. Lippy bitch, remember? I’m not going out there to talk down to people. When I speak to college students, I’m going to swear up a storm. I’ll scream, pound on the lectern, even cry when I share my story.” She pinned me with a stare. “I’m going to use whatever tools are necessary to make them hear me. If it keeps one person from being hurt, then it was worth it to me. Of course, if I give a talk to a group of older people, I’d tone it down a little. Then, when I go back home, I’ll meet with my spiritual advisor, and tell him what I did. He’ll roll his eyes at me, say I did a good job, then send me back to work. Why? Does my language bother you?”

“Fuck, no.” I laughed. Then I grinned at her. “No, it doesn’t bother me at all.”

Her bag came around first. She picked it up, slung it over her shoulder, then turned to me. “So I’ll see you tonight?”

“You will.”

“Great. The place doesn’t really start jumping until around midnight. And I’ve been traveling nonstop for the last few days, so I can meet you there, say eleven? We’ll get a good lane, grab a few drinks, maybe a pizza, and get to know one another. Sound like a plan?”

“It does. Although you’re making this sound like a date.”

She laughed. It was a nice sound, bubbly and full of life. I could see why she was a popular speaker.

“Well, it is in a way. It’s been forever since I’ve been out, so I’m looking forward to it.” She launched herself into my arms, and I froze. Affection wasn’t really my thing, but I gave her a quick squeeze. She stepped back and scowled at me.

“Didn’t anyone ever teach you how to hug? Try again.”

She wrapped her arms around my waist. I sighed and slid mine over her shoulders. When I turned her loose, she straight up scowled at me. It was funnier than hell. This woman stood all of five six or so, and I towered over her at six and a half feet.

“You know, you can bend, right. You make me feel like I’m hugging a tree.” I was going to tell her hugging wasn’t really my thing, but she cut me off. “We’re going to keep trying until you get it right. I’ve got nothing but time.”

I growled, pulled her close, and lifted her to my height. She put her arms around my thick neck and squeezed.

She kissed me on the cheek. “Now that’s what I call a hug.”

I put her back down on the floor. She cuffed me on the arm, straightened her bag on her shoulder, and headed for the doors. Before she left, she turned and gave me a wave. Warmth bloomed in my chest. Maybe she was right. Coming to Milwaukee had changed my outlook on life. I’d made myself a friend.

Of course, I was fully aware of how short lived that could be.